Discomfortable, A.J. Bond
Discomfortable, A.J. Bond
7 Rating(s)
List: $41.95 | Sale: $29.37
Club: $20.97

Discomfortable
What Is Shame and How Can We Break Its Hold?

Author: A.J. Bond

Narrator: A.J. Bond

Unabridged: 11 hr 57 min

Format: Digital Audiobook Download

Published: 11/23/2021


Synopsis

The go-to guide to understand and unpack shame: what it is, why we feel it, and how to undo the lies it tells us about ourselves.

Are you ready to get Discomfortable?

This is a book about shame: what it is, why we have it, and how we can break its hold on our happiness. We all know shame: it's that feeling that tells us that somehow, who we are is inherently wrong. It's more than embarrassment or regret: it shakes us to the core. And most of all, it tells us that we need to be, feel, and act differently in order to be seen, loved, and accepted.

Author and "shame-ed" coach AJ Bond takes us through his own shame breakthrough, sharing how he went from I'd rather die than be gay to uncovering and reclaiming his inherent wholeness and worth. With unexpected humor, warmth, and candid personal stories, Bond shows readers:
 

  •  Why shame shows up--the trauma, fixed mindsets, and messaging that give it a foothold
  •  How shame tricks you into believing there's something wrong with you, even when you're perfectly right
  •  The evolutionary reasons we humans developed a sense of shame (and why it doesn't serve us today)
  •  How to manage and deprogram shame through connection, gratitude, and empowered choice
  •  How we can re-parent ourselves, be fully seen, and feel fully loved

Bond shines a light on this feeling that doesn't want to be seen, heard, or named--and invites us to bring our own shame into the open and release it to reclaim and reframe our lives in a powerful new way.

Reviews

Goodreads review by James on January 24, 2022

I found this to be a very deep dive on shame. It has a lot of great information on developmental conditioning; emotions and emotional processing; humans as social animals; healing from the wounds of our past, especially shame; and a bunch more. I only gave it four stars though as much of it was a re......more

Goodreads review by Elizabeth on May 08, 2024

I picked this up because I'm interested in learning more about the topic of shame and how it affects our lives. The only other person I know who writes about this topic is Brene Brown, and I was curious to see how Bond's take on the topic differed from Brown's. Bond approaches the topic with humor a......more

Goodreads review by Lindsey on May 18, 2022

Super solid read. Some definite overlap with Brene Brown’s work, but an excellent supplement if you’re interested in exploring shame & vulnerability. Equal parts theory & personal anecdotes, which felt like a healthy balance. But damn, did he cover a lot of ground in this book! Fellow chronic people......more

Goodreads review by Roy on February 25, 2022

It took a while before it clicked. It's sometimes a bit too theoretical. And it's applied to his live, and his story about being gay. So I thought: I'm not a therapist, and I'm not gay. Is this book for me? But the further I read, the more I read some insights that really made me think. Like self-imp......more

Goodreads review by Mary on July 20, 2022

I liked this book, and I rented it from the library at a time when I really needed it. It’s taken me months to get through it but all along the way I’ve been having difficult conversations in therapy about shame. The ending was a little underwhelming in terms of the Authors recommendations for doing......more


Quotes

"Conveyed through personalized psychological insights, [Discomfortable] pairs its topical explorations of shame with tender, funny revelations, resulting in an approachable, earnest guidebook to living a more authentic life."
—Foreword Reviews
“Being able to handle shame is a superpower. I recommend this book to anyone that wants to feel bolder, genuinely free, and empowered.”
—Liv Larsson, author of Anger, Guilt and Shame and Nonviolent Communication trainer and mediator

“Bond writes beautifully about his personal journey of self-discovery and growth and sheds much light on the universal experience of shame as ‘emotional kryptonite.’”
—Sheila Rubin and Bret Lyon, cofounders and codirectors of the Center for Healing Shame

“A.J. Bond’s almost obsessive focus on seeing the world through the lens of shame provides many fascinating insights into both the obvious and hidden role that shame plays in our culture and individual lives. His book is a wonderful balance of autobiographical sharing interwoven with summaries of the academic influences that have helped him understand and heal from his own lifelong relationship to shame. A captivating and intriguing read for anyone dealing with the lingering effects of chronic shame in their life.”
—Dr. Douglas J Tataryn, originator of the Bio-Emotive Framework